Sunday, January 11, 2009
another day, another disagreement
let me start this off by saying, i love Jesus Christ with all my heart and soul, and i am a christian. i just don't get it sometimes. i am fully grown, and i am a pastor's daughter, have been all my life. i love the Lord and i know He takes care of me, and i would never want to live the life of someone who doesn't know Him. i always say i love the Lord, sometimes i just don't care for the people who work for Him. this blog will be a lot about that. i am also in the process of writing a book about my life as a pastor's daughter. but today and right now, i am in shock and awe. i am dating a wonderful man who is not a christian, and before everyone tells me, i know i am not supposed to be unequally yoked. but, my last relationship was with a christian, and we were engaged, he broke our engagement off out of no where, stomped on my heart, and completely ruined my life, of which i am still picking up the pieces. so, i am now dating a non-christian. that was not a conscious decision, it's just how it worked out. he is loving, caring, and during these months of financial ruin, thanks to the last guy, he has nearly supported me. i asked my pastor father if he wanted to meet him, and he reminded me that i am not supposed to be unequally yoked, which again i know, and then said, "i need some time." i am in complete shock and awe. for those of you who are not familiar with bible terms, unequally yoked means christians are only supposed to date christians. 2 corinthians 6:14 says "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?" i am still shocked though. we all sin everyday. we speed. some of us swear. we call people "dumb jerks" or whatever phrase we use. people lie. and now i guess i am sinning by dating a non christian. well, he's wonderful to me and i love him. and now my dad has to have time to make up his mind as to whether or not he wants to meet him. i just don't get it. Jesus hung out with prostitute, thieves, tax collectors, and all kinds of other sinners. my dad meets all kinds of non christians every day in his job and other places and is nice to them, but needs time to decide whether or not he wants to meet my boyfriend. this makes zero sense to me. it's just all part of being a pastor's daughter, and the effect it has had on my life...
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Being compared to prostitutes and thieves is one thing, but being compared to a tax collector is where I take offense!
ReplyDeleteYou are strong, and have always given me advice about things and One thing I know to be true is the love your family has for you, it is also true that they will not always approve of the choices you make in your life,but you also need to take into consideration that they just don't want you to be hurt anymore than you already have been.But as you said a "fully grown pastor's daughter" and as long as you are confident in your life choices then everything will fall into place.
ReplyDeleteomi, i love you so much and it breaks my heart to see you pushing away the people that love you the most. who was there for you when you were completely disabled by a car accident? who bathed you and combed a weeks worth of tangles out of your hair? who came to see you every day, multiple times a day while you were in the hospital? who took you into their home when they were broke, and supported you financially while you couldn't work? who waited on you hand and foot, gladly and with no complaints for months while you rehabilitated? how can you think that the people that did that for you don't love you with all their hearts?
ReplyDeletei don't know what it's like with your friends, but it seems like your definition of your family accepting you means that we have to always agree with and celebrate everything you do, even things you know yourself and admit are not right. how can that be?
no one agrees 100% all the time. how can people that love you celebrate decisions you make that will bring you pain? if God is the ultimate source of love and He says that this relationship is wrong, then how can your family that loves you do anything other than that?
we love you and want to have relationship with you, but you push us away. you pick fights, you make arguments out of nothing. how can you explain that we all got along so well when you were hurt and walking so closely with the Lord, seeking Him so hard, but now we don't get along. how can it be that the three of us get along with each other, but it's all our fault that we have such strife in our relationships with you?
i'm sure your blog will be very popular. people love to hear juicy details slamming chritians. but you have broke mom's heart, and when daddy reads this, he will be heartbroken, too. so much for not talking bad about daddy to all your friends. now you are going all the way to talking about him to the entire world.
i am praying for you. i have to believe that you are sick and that this comes out of that. the alternative is too hard to think of.
i'm sure you'll probably delete this, but i hope you read it at least and think about it. we love you so much and want to have the best relationship with you.